Whitewashes, bloody excuses and funny quotes !!!

A collection of funny quotes over the week or so, except for one that was quoted earlier this year by Wayne Bridge of Chelsea FC. Starting of with a pseudo-funny but actually a sombre one by the one and the only Ozzie.

1) Ozzie Guillen is one of the most colorful characters in sports today. Manager of Chicago White Sox baseball team had this to say afterbeing battered in the doubleheader by Boston Red Sox on Friday,"(Today) was 12 hours of my life wasted, and I am never going to get it back". Boston outscored Chicago 21-4 in the doubleheader, and swept the four game series with a combined score of 46-7, taking all the momentum ahead of their much-hyped three game series against NY Yankees. Somehow you can't help feeling sorry for Ozzie. Good luck to you next year.

2) Atleast once in our life we have given silly excuses to support our case when we were kids, and even when were adults. This is the funniest one I have heard in a while. Majid Haq happens to play for Scotland cricket team, and was supposed to represent their team against Ireland in the Intercontinental cup, an ICC sponsored tournament, I guess. But he backed off citing work commitments, and this is what he said. "My dad runs a takeaway in Paisley and I have to help out this weekend because my mum and brother are both away in Pakistan, one of our chefs is unavailable and our delivery driver has gone to jail for three weeks."

3) Chelsea FC and England left-back Wayne Bridge had this to say, earlier this year, after Chelsea struggled to beat some lowly team in English FA cup, "A win is a win, and I am glad we took three points out of this game." FA cup is a knockout tournament, you win you stay, you lose and you go home. Wayne was so confused about the tournament he was playing that he probably thought that was at a champions League game or a Premiership match.

4) "I've got four women in my house - my wife and my three daughters - and I tell you what, it's pretty scary. I keep my head down and if we're out shopping I try and look in a man's shop while they make their minds up." - Ian Holloway gives his verdict on who wears the trousers, probably after Roy Keane's rant against soccer stars' WAGs (wives and girlfriends).

5) "I love the big man, absolutely brilliant. Some of the films were a bit dodgy. That one where he was diving off a cliff, climbed back up to the top, his hair was immaculate and he wasn't even wet... and for me that's why he's the King." - Ian Holloway's Elvis tribute in his BBC column. Looks like our Rajini is not far behind in style stakes.

6) "Drogba will finish top scorer by a long stretch and Tevez won't be too far behind." - Someone at one of the online forums about the weekend Premiership games on BBC.

7) "Nothing surprises me any more in the Premiership, but that surprises me." - Alan Curbishley on the delay in the move for Kieron Dyer to West Ham.

8) "He is different from our other strikers... he can score goals." - Liverpool FC manager Rafael Benitez on Ukrainian Andrei Voronin. Err...isn't that what strikers are supposed to do anyways ???

9) "Don't hoover up while Chelsea are playing because if you knock the telly, Robben will fall over." - Former Dutch international Ruud Gullit quotes chaos theory scientists to give his verdict on Chelsea!

10) "And the two strikers exchange hands..." - During the Radio Scotland commentary of the last Rangers game, as Nacho Novo replaced Kris Boyd...Must have been quite a scary one to watch !!!

Darjeeling Limited and No Country for Old Men

2007 is going to be the year in which two of the four finest film directors of our generation (the next generation according to me) will be releasing their long awaited creations. The directors are Wes Anderson (The Darjeeling Limited), and Coen Brothers (no Country for Old Men). For those of you who had been following my orkut profile would have come across these movie names, for some time now.

I saw trailer of Darjeeling Limited when I went for a stylish film by an unconventional but brilliant film director Danny Boyle (Sunshine), earlier today. Sheer joy of seeing a Wes Anderson trailer after so long a time on big screen is indescribable. This movie, partly shot in India, is about three estranged brothers Owen Wilson, Adrien Brody and Jason Schwartzman, who try to revive their blood relationships as brothers while on a spiritual journey across India, after their dad's death. Wes Anderson's simple and precise handling of complex subjects through intelligent narration has given him a cult status across the world. This movie seems to be no different. Even though Wes is once again blessed with fine actors in his production, strangely no Bill Murray and Kumar Pallana, Wes seems to have hit bull's eye in screenwriting mastery, once again, from his trailer. I hope movie turns out as good as it seems. Check out the trailer at http://imdb.com/title/tt0838221/trailers

Coen Brothers (Joel and Ethan) have given us so many memorable movies. Even though I had seen many Hollywood action and comedy movies by the time I entered 5th grade, my first film-noir type movie was Coen bros' Rising Arizona in my 5th or 6th grade. It was one of the movies that had a positive influence on me on screenwriting, and was the start of what has turned out to be a very fine sequence Coen bros' movies at the hallowed Sathyam and Devi cinemas in Chennai. The list goes like Raising Arizona, Miller's Crossing and Fargo, interspersed with The Hudsucker Proxy and the Big Lebowski (the ultimate dude movie), and even a O Brother, Where Art Thou? His latest offering is, based on a very popular book by Cormac McCarthy by the same name, set in Texas-Mexican border, about a sequence of events related to a drug deal gone bad. A story set in deserted-eery Texas, about the role of chance in life, stash of cash, blood, revenge and madness is always a great recipe for cult success. I wish November come sooner, atleast for the premiere of this latest Coen' bros' baby.

Remdawg, Don and Red Sox nation

One of the reasons why its worth watching Boston Red Sox play baseball day-in and day-out on NESN (New England Sports Network) is for the commentators Jerry Remy and Don Orsillo, and ofcourse the pretty ladies Tina Cervasio and Hazel Mae. Don and Remy are really an oddball combination. With their witty remarks and inane discussions they really liven up the mood, especially when Red Sox is floundering, as they have been offlate.

Not long back, Boston was ahead of New York Yankees by nearly 15 games in the AL East division of MLB!!! And then the Yankees literally crushed all the weak teams down the divisions, while Boston weren't that ruthless. After a couple of shocking away series for the team as a whole, one to Seattle and one to Detroit, and shocking performances of Eric Gagne against Baltimore and more recently against LA Angels, the lead was down to a mere 5 games. There was genuine fear in the air about the impending series in Bronx...Is this a reprise of last year's Boston Massacre??? Red Sox were ahead by 3 games this time last year when Yankees visited Boston for a 5 game series in 4 days. Its more apt to say, they came, they saw, and they battered us to submission. Those 4 days were too much for any Bostonian to handle. In a flash, the miracle of 2004 series was forgotten, and then perennial pessimistic side of Boston started to surface. After all New York is the evil empire, and Boston is the perennial underdog fighting the oppressors !!! When you see buses in Boston screaming with "Go Sox" logos this time of the year, when series' against Yankees are on the horizon, you can almost sense the panic in the air. A couple of elderly ladies from Dallas and Austin were amused to see the passion that is associated with Boston-New York rivalry in sports, especially in baseball.

Anyways, as I write this post, Boston's Curt Schilling was having a rough time handling LA's batters. In 5 innings he had already conceded 4 runs, and the Angels were consistenly threatening to score more. You could see that Angels were more relaxed and Boston's shoulders were drooping. Schilling was having lots of problems in locating his fast ball. And then he pitches a lovely split-finger fast ball only to see it disappear above the Green Monster. Unfortunately for Schilling, the batter he faced was Vladimir Gurrerro. And then came the news that Yankees had defeated Detroit with Roger clemens improving his record. Boston was trailing by 5 runs, and had to win to preserve 5 game lead over New York. Everything seemed to go down, and the crowd at Fenway were quiet, and the crowd at the bar I was watching was staring in disbelief. Its at this moment Remdawg and Don changed the topic of discussion from baseball to dating women, that changed the entire mood in the bar. It goes like this.

Remdawg: Do you remember the pick up line I gave you 2 years back? That was a good one.
Don: yes it is. How can I forget that? You were in great mood then...
Remdawg: Yes I was. But I wasn't trying to pick up girls. I was only helping you guys. I think we were in New York for the game. And we saw this unbelievably beautiful woman at the restaurant, eating all alone.
Don: And you walked upto her and made a conversation...
Remdawg: Thats right. I walked up to her, and asked her if she is eating alone??? And she said "yes". I then said " You shouldn't be !!!".
Don: and then you walked away !!!! leaving her openmouthed !!!
Remdawg: Yes I did. Its one of those days, I was in the mood, and I was only helping out the other guys who were very stiff...

This and the ensuing conversation really lightened the mood at the bar, and we were all smiling even though another Boston defeat was looming large. All of a sudden Boston's offense started firing. They loaded the bases, and were harassing LA's starter Weaver. Then Big Papi hits a grandslam, and in a flash Boston was ahead by 1 run. A shellshocked Weaver had to be taken off the game, and Red Sox toyed with LA's relief pitchers, and in the end scored 10 unanswered runs !!!

Atlast there is some hope of a fight, and we eagerly await our showdown with New York, first in Bronx and later at Fenway Park. It has been a pleasure listening to Remdawg and Don over the games. Their silly conversations liven up the mood when Red Sox are down, and its agreat feeling when Boston claws back the lead, and the game !!! Go Sox.